Check out part one of the series on communication for the mechanical engineer here. 

1. When to ask a colleague for help
   1. You were hired to solve problems; if you ask for help as soon as a problem arises, it will communicate the wrong message to your team.
   2. Each team/manager is different. Before seeking input from peers, ask your manager how long you should work on a task that’s stumping you. I have found this to be anywhere from 15 to 30 minutes for most tasks and maybe 5 minutes for a brief matter your peer could resolve in seconds. Each employer will have different expectations.
      1. It is good practice to detail what you’ve tried thus far when approaching a colleague; that way, they save time, and you have demonstrated your efforts.
   3. Others want to be sought out for their expertise. Do yourself and them the favor of asking.
      1. “I would appreciate your help with…”
      2. “You probably know way more about … than me; can you give me some input?”
      3. “Can I borrow you for a few minutes? I am looking for guidance on …”
   4. No one expects you to know everything, particularly if you’ve recently graduated or changed industries.
   5. If you’re a people pleaser, it will require extra effort to make sure that you’re delivering what you think is best, after having received outside input.
2. Confusion
   1. You won’t garner respect floundering around trying to intuit something you didn’t understand. ASK.
      1. “Can you restate that?”
      2. “Can you say that in a different way?”
      3. “Let’s look at it together.”
      4. “Can you draw what you’re describing?”
      5. “How is that different from…?”
3. Call vs e-message
   1. For responses you’re willing to wait 1-3 days for, and that won’t require a lot of back and forth, email is appropriate. 
   2. For urgent requests or matters that will require exchanging a lot of information or brainstorming solutions together, pick up the phone or talk face-to-face. 
   3. Both call and email may be subject to company formatting requirements.
   4. For emails requesting multiple pieces of information, make it clear that you’re looking for multiple responses. Numbering bullet points can be helpful. When requesting many dimensions, consider providing a drawing with blank boxes for required dimensions. This will decrease the chance of missing information.
4. Organized email folders
   1. Client-based
      1. Create filters for each letter of the alphabet
      2. Create sub-filters for each client, nested under the first letter
   2. Project-based
      1. Filters for each project number
   3. If you need to be able to search your email with specific keywords, reply to a relevant email, address it to only you, and include keywords you are likely to use when searching for this thread.
5. When to CC
   1. Err on the side of including too few people in emails, and having to be encouraged to add others when needed.
   2. When in doubt, ask your manager who needs to be included/excluded from messages.
   3. Most users should have their default reply function be “reply all”
6. Requesting acknowledgement of communication
   1. Do not assume that you can fold your hands, awaiting a response because you’ve sent an email or left a voicemail. Make sure to confirm receipt of your message, and follow up accordingly.
   2. “Please advise regarding next steps.”
   3. “Please let me know when you’ve received this message.”
   4. “Please confirm that this project will be complete by Friday.” 
   5. “I will give you a call if I haven’t heard back by 3 pm. Thank you.”
7. The Front-Page Test
   1. As an engineer, you will have to carry yourself professionally through tense and trying situations. Your writing will represent you long after you’ve forgotten about it.
   2. Know that whatever you’ve written down and shared with another can be copied, forwarded, re-shared, taken out of context, etc.
   3. To avoid future regret, draft your message, then read the message and imagine it posted on the front page of the newspaper alongside your name. Would you be able to live with that legacy? If not, you should consider either rewriting your message or having the conversation in person.
8. The And-Stance
   1. Taken from Difficult Conversations by Douglas Stone, et al.
   2. Understanding someone’s perspective doesn’t mean that you have to give up on yours.
   3. “I believe you did not intend to insult my work, AND I was deeply affected by what you said.”
   4. “I understand that you’ve promised the customer delivery by next week, AND I cannot resolve our supplier’s supply chain issue in time.”
   5. “I hear that you’ve extended me your best offer, AND I require $20k more to make this work for me.”
9. How to Disagree
   1. You will have to disagree with peers, bosses, executives, lawyers, etc., in your career; learn how to do it effectively. 
   2. Thoroughly review Paul Graham’s essay on the topic.
      1. “What does it mean to disagree well? Most readers can tell the difference between mere name-calling and a carefully reasoned refutation, but I think it would help to put names on the intermediate stages.” – Paul Graham
      2. “You don’t have to be mean when you have a real point to make. In fact, you don’t want to. If you have something real to say, being mean just gets in the way.” – Paul Graham
   3. Humility
      1. Beyond effective disagreement, recipients need to be able to receive disagreement well. You can’t change your peer’s humility, but you can work on yours and make sure your disagreements refute their main point instead of resorting to DH0-DH5 tactics.
      2. Have a plan, and be ready to change it
      3. If you struggle with humility, let me share a few questions to reflect on:
         1. Did you earn your IQ?
         2. Did you earn your genes?
         3. Has an employer or professor taken a chance on you before you had relevant skills?
         4. Have you leveraged connections to land a job or other professional opportunities?
         5. Were you born with any advantages others don’t have (resources, role-models, parental attention, etc.)?
      4. There is a time and place to tactfully acknowledge that you’ve made the most of your advantages, but never forget that no one truly is “self-made”.
      5. “…humility is not thinking more of myself or thinking less of myself, it is thinking of myself less.” – Timothy Keller
         1. I think this sums humility up well.
10. Drawings
    1. You’ve been considering and meticulously designing XYZ widget for days; you know its every feature and its end use. Whoever is making this widget likely has ZERO context, which you take for granted—they only have the piece of paper with your drawing on it. The drawing communicates your design to those who will manufacture your widget.
    2. It is best practice to talk with the fabricator about your widget regardless of how seasoned a designer you are. A few moments of dialogue can keep your project timeline on track. If you don’t have time to discuss the design before fabrication, do you really have time for materials to be procured and fabricated twice?
    3. The individual who makes unique low-volume widgets regularly almost certainly knows more about good design, manufacturability, and drawing best practices than you. Be humble, take feedback to heart, and befriend them. There’s a world where the fabricator will go out of their way to ask you questions just before the point of no return, to make sure your project is a success. A smile, a “thank you,” and assuming they know better than you will go a long way.
    4. Ask your employer for several good drawings, review them, and note recurring elements/features; make sure your drawings utilize these elements your employer values.
    5. Sheets are free; use them to your advantage. Clarity is more important than brevity with drawings.
    6. The drawing is the contract. If you receive the component that you’ve detailed in your drawing, but it isn’t what you wanted, only you are to blame.
11. Writing to learn
    1. It’s easy to see gaps in your thinking if you have to explain your logic to others. You can reap the same benefits by writing out your thoughts and reviewing them on paper. 
    2. Intermittently write out the requirements of your current project, making sure you’re staying the course with design decisions.
    3. If you’re stuck on a problem, write down answers to these questions.
12. Talking to learn
    1. Talk through your problem in the shower, on a walk, or with a peer.
       1. It’s often better to have an audience with a different technical skill set.
          1. Check out Range by David Epstein 
    2. I find this to be more productive than writing to learn.
13. Tools
    1. Visual
       1. Physical models / prototypes
          1. Putting a model in the hands of others can communicate more effectively than dozens of presentation slides.
       2. CAD images
          1. Professional CAD images
          2. PhotoRoom
       3. Screenshots
          1. Greenshot
    2. Grammar
       1. Grammarly
       2. Character Count Tool
       3. QuillBot
       4. Convert Case
       5. Share or link to quotes & text in Chrome
       6. Proof read your message before sending it, or have a program read it to you. 
14. Weekly manager one-on-ones
    1. If your manager doesn’t suggest weekly check-ins, ask for them. 
    2. Take ownership of your feedback and development.
       1. Come prepared to 1:1s with discussion points—tactical, relational, and developmental.
    3. When you’re interning, ask for frequent reviews—you need feedback to be your best, and you want that. Your manager will be impressed with your commitment to growth and transparency. 
15. Qualifying language
    1. Examples: “We’re expecting”, “should”, “may”, “it’s looking like”, “if all goes well”, “it appears”, “as far as we know”, “I believe”, “to my knowledge”.
    2. People want to hear absolute language, but if you speak a falsity that is revealed later, you lose credibility as a subject matter expert. You should only speak absolutely on technical matters if you have reason for confidence.

As stated in the last post – If this list seems overwhelming, rest assured these skills will become intuitive with practice. Focus on a few items at a time and give yourself grace as you’re learning.

Here’s a small sampling of topics I will discuss in the upcoming post(s):

• Affirming others’ ideas
• Accepting praise
• Difficult conversations
• The importance of tone
• Delivering bad news

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